epicrapbattlesofhistoryfandomcom-20200222-history
User blog:The Flatwoods Monster/ParaNorman vs Cole Sear. Epic Rap Battles of Horror Season 5
Lol. Did you guys really think I wasn’t going to do this battle? lmao. Anyways, welcome back to Season 5 of Epic Rap Battles of Horror. This is a suggestion that’s been around for a long time. It basically summarizes everything I wanted to do with this series. Let’s just kinda dive into it. The main character of the animated 2012 film of the same name, ParaNorman, raps against protagonist of M. Night’s only good film, Cole Sear, to see who’s the superior child to see and interact with the dead. This battle was suggested by a lot of people, but one of the bigger supporters was Cave so shout out to him since I kept on saying I wasn't going to do it (even though he probably didn't believe that for a second.) Red vs Clover is still unlikely tho so sorry fam. There’s a lot more connections about these two that I won’t bother to go into, but that’s basically the underlining theme. A main part, as you can guess, is mostly contrast. Anyways, hope you enjoy the battle. Let me know what you think, what lines stood out, etc. As always, thanks for reading. Key Cole Sear in this color Dr. Malcolm in this color Norman Babcock in this color Neil Downe in this color Agatha in this color (full power is this color) Mitch Downe in this color Courtney Babcock in this color Judge Hopkins in this color Beat: Stackin Up Introduction Announcer: EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HORROR VS! BEGIN! The Battle Norman & Neil: Heed this warning; A storm is coming to stop your motions much like my art form, My roarin’ performing leaves kids wanting more like Norman, Norman, NORMAN! Something you need to know; My dead-raising head contains things that can’t be explained So take your shady claims and stay out of my way, ‘cause I’ve got the brawn and the BRAAAINS SSSSS… The angry mobs go bonkers awaiting this slaughter, Torches rise as I spit hotter, to walk up and down this goner like an M. Nightcrawler May be praised by critics, but it’s just for his simplistic ending that even dimwits know, But are there really ghosts? Frick no! That’s the plot twist, bro! The kiddo’s a crazy schizo! Cole Sear: Doctor? Yes, Cole? I’m being haunted by the cartoon Frodo and Sam. Please, elaborate. His flows so dead, it must have been written by his granny Is that all? Mostly, he’s got a perverted obese beast he brings with him, though Name’s Neil, but he’s so dense, you’d swear he’s got Downe syndrome My horror shines borderline lore divine; “Ghosts” are just hopes of Paranorman’s mind And when you wage this war of mine, you’ll be horrified to the Core-aline But when could he win? When he’s awake? No. That’s as likely as his sequel, But in his dreams? Still no. His future unfolds, and I see dead people Norman: The only way you could kill me is if I was forced to sit through your movie, The Dead are Coming; You’ll meet true Maleficence when you awaken the Sleeping Beauty Aggie: I HATE that story! I HATE this puny baby that I’ve been brought back from the grave to slay! With one line of dialogue he banks all of his fame off of, and yet still nobody knows his name! The flawless goddess will leave you in a coffin; Then I’ll take that and stomp on it! You leave me nauseous; A bigger toxin to the track then your director is to the box office! I’ll tear apart every bone in your body and pAINT PICTURES '''USING WHAT'S LEFT OF YOUR HEAD!' Well, that was frightening. It’s all fun and games until someone raises the dead. Cole Sear: And so you’ve risen a freak to the beat; But you’ll find no better bully than these remains, Left decaying and yet she claims she was framed; No friends, but still likes to hang I’m stacking up facts to rain wrath upon the out-matched hag named Aggie, Call this fight Gravity, ‘cause this psychopath never should have crossed paths with me But perhaps you’re not so evil as you seem; I aim to redeem you and your legend, Since your presence is based on an unjust sentence; Premature death invokes your vengeance, So disappear for another year, your curse ends here; You can’t invoke my fears, I’ll burn the witch to tears. Play with hot Coals, and get Sear’d Norman, Neil & Aggie: Cute story, but I’m not listening. It’s almost Midnight. Listen as the clock ticks, You can speak to the dead, but can’t rap against them; Both tragic, and ironic. Gore galore will pour when we score this quarrel, you’ll learn morals from this immortal '''You’re a B-rate freeway to every cliche.' You don't become a hero by being normal Cole Sear: Even Mitch could shoot a straighter diss, against my wits, you’re all headed for trouble, Crumbling this klutz and his tubby bud to rubble, you’ll kick the bucket just like your uncle I’m Who You’re Gonna Call; Rendered your incestous spectre ancestors buried already ‘cause I’ve got six senses, but your rapping doesn’t make any. 'Announcer:' WHO WON? WHO'S NEXT? YOU DECIDE! EPIC RAP BATTLES OF-''' (The digustingly poor quality logo of Season 1 appears behind the current logo, transparent. It begins making a "ooooh" noise.) '''JESUS CHRIST! HORROR! (The logo speeds off) Outro Who Won? ParaNorman Cole Sear HINT DECODING: Carbon's Atomic Number: Carbon is the technical term for Coal. Its atomic number is Six. Coal = Cole, Six = Sixth Sense Seth Brundles Grave: Basically, graveyards signify dead people. That's about as simple as it gets lol Naughty List: People who are on the naughty list get Coal for Christmas. Once again, Coal = Cole Dipper & Coraline: This was foreshadowing, more than a hint. When Aggie's curse begins, the skys turn green and black, and a giant face of a stereotypical witch appears in the clouds. As mentioned, Dipper, Coraline and ParaNorman are a super popular theme for crossovers. Like, RIDICULOUSLY popular theme. Coraline says "not again" because she was made by the same director as ParaNorman. Not really even a hint, lol, it's a story thing more than anything. HINT TO THE NEXT BATTLE: Undynetheundying.png Tkandsalt.png Challenger.jpg 6/20/12 Category:Blog posts